College Tour With My Grateful Child

When helping your child to choose a college, ask him, do you prefer an urban or rural environment? Approximately how many glass shops do you want to see in the town? In your opinion, how many tattoo parlors should their be within walking distance?

I’m Getting The Goddamned Shot

Studying my bloody finger, I weighed the possibility of contracting rabies versus telling my mother that I had been bitten by a wild animal. I opted for rabies.

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